The Ongoing Business of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a huge part of the Christian’s life. If we don’t know how or we refuse to forgive those who have hurt us, we can be assured that we are not Christians at all. Forgiveness is at the heart of Christianity because it is at the heart of why Christ came. And after all, Christ did say that if we do not forgive, neither will we be forgiven (Matt. 6:15)

For me, the difficult part of forgiveness is that it’s not typically a one time event. Sometimes it is ongoing because someone hurt me deeply, and it takes years to finally come to a point where I can say I’ve fully, unequivocally forgiven – and even though I get to a point where I can say it, I have my doubts that I mean it.

At other times, forgiveness is ongoing because someone keeps hurting me. I can look at the type of situations as an opportunity to practice my math …

Let’s see, 0 x 7 is 0, 7 x 7 is 49 so I gotta forgive this twerp 490 times. 

Or I can remember that the mathematical equation is beside the point, and that the real point is that there should be no end to my river of forgiveness because there is no end to Jesus’ river of forgiveness.

The concept is easy, but it can be incredibly difficult to live out.

The easy thing seems to be to live angry. But is anger truly the easier route? Anger just rips a gals innards to shreds. It accomplishes nothing of value, and harms to the point of even physical destruction, while the person who has offended seemingly suffers nothing.

Recently, God has put me to the test in the area of forgiveness. I often say to Him, “I’ve already forgiven so and so who did such and such.” But then He places so and so who did such and such back into my life to re-establish a relationship with them. In other words, He tests me. And the testing causes me to realize how much of a lifelong process forgiveness can be. It’s tempting to think we have a duty to forgive – once. And then we move on. But cuts are deep and scars never heal, right?

Right. Just ask Jesus. He’s also got a few scars that constantly remind Him of what others did to Him. “Others” being me. Brenda Renee Coats. I crucified Him. And yet it’s impossible to ever be a bigger sinner than He is a Savior. He is always willing to forgive me for any sin I’ve ever committed, am committing, or will commit.

How can I be willing to do the same? How can I do the same, and not merely be willing to do the same? Or willing to be willing? Sometimes willing to be willing is all you can say you are. But at some point, it’s time to move on from willing to be willing. It’s time to actually be willing And then it’s time to move from willing to actually forgiving. And forgiving again. And again and again. Just as Jesus does.

These are baby steps I’m speaking of, but they’re important steps, too. Because if you take a lot of baby steps, pretty soon (or maybe much later), you can look back and see how far you’ve come. God will challenge you along the way. He’ll throw a boulder in your path. Or a patch of ice. He’ll let you fall. But He’s also always there to pick you back up after you’ve bashed your toe, broken your hip, or scabbed up your face. You’ll be ugly and walk like a Weeble, but you’ll still be His.

Ironically, while you’re so wrapped up with the business of ongoing forgiveness, so is He. And it’s the realization of how deep your own forgiveness runs that keeps you in the ongoing business of forgiving others.

The cycle is beautiful, tedious, and taxing. But also required if we claim to be a follower of Christ.