Psst! BVM is Pro-Abort, Pro-Gay, and …

I recently took my occasional detour into the world of the World. I bought a book by Steve Berry — who’d done such a cool job with The Romanov Prophecy — entitled The Third Secret. I know, I know. I KNOW! Okay?

Really … I know.

But, I bought it. I tried to read it. The presentation of matters theological was poorly done, totally illogical. But, I’d paid for the book, I was going to read it.

Y’all, I got about 30 pages from the end and tore it up. Literally. It was paperback, I’m a man. Rocks, Paper, Scissors … I won! I even tore the cover into little giblets and deposited them atop about twenty severed gum sided sections already in the trash can.

Let me spoil it for you: The real third secret of Our Lady of Fatima?

(Caution: It has been suppressed by the evil Roman Catholic Church.)

The “Virgin Mary” claims that God is not happy, pretty P-O’d in fact, because … women should have freedom of choice (as she did!) in carrying babies to “full term” … you should be able to love and marry whomever you wish (even same sex) … celibacy is not required of clergy … women should be ordained.

Okay, maybe the celibacy part needs to be revisited. But that’s no secret, really.

Now, I’m fully aware that in the few remaining pages I dissed there might have been some sort of correction. I doubt it. In fact, to sew the seeds of doubt in the hearts and minds of the faithful is a biggie.

I promise: No more Steve Berry.

Now, for something completely different (but a whole lot alike), here’s Subdeacon Seraphim writing in the style of Dave Barry about Dracula and an Icon.