HUMOUR: I Don’t Like Fasting

I don’t like Fasting.
It’s too expensive.
We have to change our daily status quo.
We have to give up our “same-oh same-oh.”

It costs so much more to switch over to Organic Soy Milk from our regular milk. Veggie Burger costs more than hamburger, and eating out at Red Lobster is killing our budget!

The other day in coffee hour, we were talking about one of the ethnic groups in our church, and how they always mess things up for the rest of us by seeing things so differently, and how their kids are such a problem for everyone.

I could hardly get into the coffee hour because some weird visitors were standing by the door wondering if they would stay or leave. They were obviously not Orthodox! They were huddled as a family by the door, coats in hand. They looked like refugees from some disaster. I had to say, “Excuse me.” and push past them just to get in to the food line. I think they finally left.

The coffee hour didn’t have nearly enough doughnuts and bagels for me. I was so hungry! And they ran out of stuff before the children even came in from Church School. Man! It’s a good thing we got our three doughnuts before they got there! You should have seen their faces when they pawed through the empty doughnut boxes! I know it’s time to fast, but they need a lot more goodies on the table so we can have a good hearty coffee hour meal, and maybe something for the kids.

I get these letters from charities asking for money for the poor and such. I just can’t do anything about it because we’re spending all our money on these high tech substitutes for meat, and dairy. Besides, we’re taking a cruise in a couple of months.

Ah fasting. I just don’t enjoy it. It’s just not fun for me, I’m sorry.

– humor from Ephrem Ron Moore

Pic FWD courtesy of Jean-Michel.