Pursued by Truth
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In today’s Gospel Jesus tells a parable about the owner of a vineyard who came in search of fruit on one of his fig trees and found none. The owner tells the gardener that he has been looking for fruit on this tree for three years and has found nothing so he tells him to cut the tree down, it is useless.
The gardener understands his frustration but asks the owner to wait a while before cutting it down. He says: “Sir, let it alone for one more year, until I dig around it and put manure on it. If it bears fruit next year, well and good; but if not, you can cut it down.” (Lk 13:9)
God truly is our kind and generous gardener. He does not lose patience with us. Instead, he waits for the opportune time to help us to bear fruit. As humans, most of us are not born knowing our purpose in life. We search, often in the wrong places for meaning and often we do not find it. This can lead to feelings of emptiness and hopelessness. But often, we are too busy to pay attention, or we make ourselves busy so we do not have to pay attention.
One woman recently said to me, “People need silence and they don’t even know it.”
She is right but I understand why people, even the ones who know they need it, don’t want to sit in silence. In the silence, the lack of meaning in our lives and all the crap that we have not worked through floats to the top. I know this from experience. Being silent often involves a certain degree of discomfort, sometimes a lot of discomfort and pain.
When we are silent, we open ourselves to God’s presence but we are also opening our souls to His manure and the work of His sharp hoe.
God doesn’t just want to chill with us in the silence, He wants to work on our souls. And that hurts.
But you know, after living a life that involves a lot more silence over the past year, I can definitely say that although it can be extremely painful to face up to the things that are inside of me and the wounds that I have experienced in life, many that are self-inflicted, I can honestly say it is worth it. I feel like God, the champion gardener, is preparing my soul to bear a unique and beautiful fruit that no one else can give to the world. And he wants to do that with all of us. We are each made for a unique and beautiful purpose to make a difference in the world.
Happy gardening.
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