Brothers, Shake It Off-Pt. 2

Brothers, Shake It Off-Pt. 2 November 8, 2013

by O’Shan Gadsden
R3 Contributor


*To read the part 1, click here
In my last post, I suggested that despite having your physical freedom, many of you are still journeying through life psychologically and spiritually imprisoned; having yet to reach your full potential!  So I ask you today, what internal warfare do you battle that manifests itself in spiritual, psychological, and interpersonal captivity? What un-evolved parts of yourself have kept you from realizing your full potential and creative power?  Do you have control of yourself? Or does your body, penis, and emotions control you? How many relationships will you ruin? How many job positions will you lose? How many hasty decisions will you continue to make? How many of those decisions have handcuffed you to a life of mediocrity and depression?
Here are some possible signs of an un-evolved man (Brothers if you see yourself on this list, you need to know you have the capacity to shift. And ladies if your brother, son, boyfriend, or husband is on this list-encourage him to reach out for help and hold him accountable):
1. He constantly needs someone to validate him (his thoughts, emotions) without having his own level of insight and plan of action;
2. He constantly shifts in his goals and life focus. He can’t seem to flourish in one area without shifting to something else before its completion;
3. He often sees sex as a confirmation of his place within hegemonic masculinity and not as a covenant of connection;
4. He is controlled by external trappings and doesn’t seem to have any depth beyond his man toys;
5. He has difficulty being honest and often just goes with the flow without a real consideration of the consequences of his actions;
6. He always puts his needs above the needs of others in an unconscious attempt to feel some level of control and sense of self-power;
7. He has a difficulty seeing beyond the present and always deals in the here-and-now without real thought to the future implications of his behavior;
8. He makes promises knowing he can’t fulfill them and then is surprised when people don’t trust him;
9. He may have goals and dreams but when it comes time to starting the process to complete them other unimportant things always seems to deter his attention and energy;
10. And instead of taking responsibility the Brother plays the blame game.
Brothers, we must not allow the un-evolved parts of us kill our beauty and our future. It is time to reflect upon the behaviors and thoughts that might be killing the possibility for happiness and fulfillment. Be it addiction, unresolved hostility and anger, sexual compulsivity, the inability to tell the truth—I challenge you this day to look deeply within and begin the work of self-honesty and healing. Let the work begin that frees you from all emotional and spiritual chains that bind your power and creativity. Let us decide this day to no longer be dead men walking! Let us rise up! As we support each other and work to decrease the rate of imprisonment for our brothers through education and remediation; let us continue to work on ourselves.
There is a scripture in Proverbs that says, “It’s the little foxes that spoil the vine.” It is those things that go unchecked and unexplored that grow to the point of infection and disease. Sisters we need you hold us accountable. Don’t let us off the hook. Love us through setting boundaries and refusing to accommodate unwholeness. Let us be encouraged! Together as a community I believe we can evolve to a place of self-love, peace, and wholeness. But we must have courage and consistency to check ourselves before we wreck ourselves!  SHAKE IT OFF! Ashe!
Follow O’Shan on Twitter @spiritmusings

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