Six Hundred Days

Yesterday was the day. I have completed six hundred days of “daily practice.” I write fairly often about this topic. And so, occasionally, I feel the need to make a post to show that I am putting my money where my mouth is.(*)

 

The Tally thus Far

For the past 600 days I have performed the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram (LBRP) on a daily basis. On top of that, it has been 449 days since I added spirit-cleansing exercises and 446 since I added some qigong-lite. It has been 112 days since my wife and I started a new meditation regimen with a teacher.

The journey thus far has not always been easy, but it was worth the effort. We think of this kind of work as drudgery, but that is because we imagine all stability has to be imposed from outside of us. This is not true.

There have been some funny moments along the way. There was the time I was in Keflavik airport in Iceland when I suddenly realized that I hadn’t done my practice. And so I set off on a little quest. As it turns out, the handicapped bathroom was just big enough for me to do my business.

There have also been a couple of moments of awesome. At Pantheacon, Jason “Bro-Witch” Mankey was running an event where the audience was raising a cone of power in a random auditorium. With all the things he needed to juggle, I volunteered to clean the room first and the play doorkeeper, so as to avoid unneeded surprises. So I wandered in before the event to do some cleaning and pre-set some wards.

This gave me a chance to do an LBRP in an empty public space that was probably 40′ x 50′ x 80′ or more. Full voice. Expanding my spirit to the walls. Becoming fully what we all are: a bridge between earth and sky. It was probably the closest I will get to public performance, and I kind of felt like a dumbass, but fortunately there was only one other person in the room at the time. Overall, it was a great experience.

And then there was last night. I’ve been pretty sick all week and I can’t say that my daily performance has been awesome. I doubt it rose to the level of lackluster. But last night, everything came together. Where there had been weakness in my arms and legs, suddenly there was strength. Where there was sickness, for a moment my spirit triumphed and brought it to heel.

Such moments are empowering, but also humbling. There was clear knowledge that this was not the “me” that fights in traffic, worries (too little) about taxes, and watches too much Netflix. This was something more. In other words, daily practice works. It works for me and it will work for anyone.

 

Talk Is Cheap

Here in the West, we do not have a lot of real-life examples of everyday people with a serious commitment to discipline. We think discipline is merely a tool for achieving some aim, not an aspect of character worth cultivating for its own sake.

Or, we believe discipline is for monks, and not the everyday citizen. I want to give the lie to that — the idea that we are incapable of basic self-discipline is a myth. It is part of the Western belief that keeps us all too busy trying to fill ourselves as if emptiness were not survivable.

Six hundred days in, I have come to believe that the LBRP will teach anyone how to stabilize the mind, body, and spirit. What you do after that is up to you. And stable is way better than full — more resilient and adaptive to context. While “full” leaves us bloated and gasping, “stable” promotes power.

 

As In the Beginning

As you might remember if you are a long-time reader, six hundred days ago, I was coming out of some serious brutal treatments for cancer. I had nothing left. My spirit was deflated, scarred, torn open, and generally in bad shape. My body was no better. Where the disease hadn’t wrecked me, the treatments had.

Yes, I wanted to live. But living takes more than just want — it means seeking out new depths and making hard commitments. Not oaths to something out there, not promises to the everyday world. Instead, a binding to bring every part of myself together.

I looked to the words of a man who understood how to do battle, Miyamoto Musashi. He wrote, “This is the truth: when you sacrifice your life, you must make fullest use of your weaponry. It is false not to do so, and to die with a weapon yet undrawn.”

 

So Through to the End

But I am not soldier, and the battle would have to be won within me. And so, driven by pure intuition, I began with the simplest, most basic ritual I knew. As soon as I had the strength to stand, I hobbled to the center of the room and began.

Raise your knife (or your wand, or even your finger) into the air directly over your head. Draw that hand down until it is at your forehead. Let the first words vibrate in your chest, your head, your bones, and every part of yourself, “AH-tah!”

 

ProTip: A Little Effort, Every Day

Generally, I do not recommend massive amounts of daily work. Unless there is some specific, elusive or challenging goal, we quickly face problems where effort gives diminishing returns. A quarter hour of intense work is usually better than three hours. If you want to put that much time in on self-development, I would recommend taking a class.

 

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(*) I am really not at the point where bragging is permissible. I heard a story about a Kannushi, a Shinto priest, who had performed misogi every day for twenty years. Twenty years! Seven thousand, three hundred and five days. Now, he has something to brag about.